Ann Allan: What’s Happenning?

Those of you who have been following my ‘journey’  to  get my new teeth will be surprised to hear that to date I still haven’t got my new knashers . A very long process I hear you say. You are so right. I’ve forgotten what it is like to have bottom teeth and I’ve even started dreaming about having a mouth full of teeth that are too big for my mouth.  As I had to have bone grafts the process took three months longer as the grafts had to ‘take’. I now have two silver caps where the implants will go and the endgame is insight. I could give yer man in James Bond a run for his money. Interviewed by Paula Geraghty at the recent Equal Marriage March in Belfast I cringed as I listened to myself and my newly acquired lisp. Oh for the pleasure of sinking my teeth into …well into anything actually.

Speaking of the Equality March I was very proud to walk along with 20,000 others in Belfast demanding that equal marriage should be available in NI, as it is in the rest of the UK and the ROI. I’m sure all of us know someone who is gay, whether a family member or a friend. I want them to feel that they are considered equal by the state and have the option to be married. If you don’t want gay marriage my advice is marry someone straight.

Periscope seems to have caught on. Pioneered by Basil McCrea, the number of subscribers has increased.  It is amazing to tune in to different parts of the world and interact with a different cultures in foreign countries for a few minutes.  Here in Norn Iron, the nightly curtain call with Basil ( and his curtains) attracts a respectable number of viewers. I have reservations as to how effective it is. I dislike the fact that it is basically a one way interaction.  By the time viewers have typed and sent an answer the conversation has moved on.  Hosts can easily become distracted and a lot of time is wasted with trivia. It also allows trolls to post comments. But I enjoy getting a look in at an occasion that I would otherwise not have the opportunity to take part in. So keep periscoping Basil.  You’re a pioneer. I’m sorry Basil that I tend to be one of those who distract you.

Unbelieveable  that we are half way through the year. Holiday time again. I have already told you I hate holidays,  so we opted for a couple of days in Portmarnock.  The ROI football team were eating in the restaurant when we arrived and Roy Keane isn’t as grumpy as he is made out to be as he smiled and said hello when we met him in the corridor. We booked a room with a view so hubby could watch the golf when he wasn’t playing golf. Imagine our disappointment when we got to our room to find it was on the ground floor, the window was covered in heavy net curtains and children were playing outside the window.  The second floor room we were moved to was bigger and the view was spectacular and should have been the room we were offered in the first place. A complaint was made and has been acknowledged.  On the second day after a sleepless night I realised I hadn’t packed essential medication.  So we booked out at 6 p.m. and headed home.  Bliss, my own bed and my own pillow.  Holidays are definitely not for me.

As I write the situation re the ‘fantasy budget ‘ remains a mystery. I’ve no idea what’s happening but we seem to have once again stepped back from the brink. Those of you of a certain age will remember Hugo Patterson in the seventies. During the workers strike we spent a lot of time on the brink waiting for the electricity to go off.

The tour of the North took place last weekend. I’ve never heard as much drivel on talkback when Nelson ‘ double glazing’ McCausland and Gerry ‘ Land Rover’ Kelly were debating marching.  For goodness sake grow up. Life is too short for putting so much store on such trivialities.   I hear that the March passed off peacefully. However I believe there was some hugging going on which hasn’t been well received.  As my old granny would have said it would make a cat laugh.😺 Make love not war

Discussing my granddaughter’s new school a little voice piped up from the back seat of the car ‘ I think I’ll probably drop out of school before I get to the grammar,  granny’  said Jack aged 7. He also tried telling me that he had been allowed to look at his report before it was sent out and he hadn’t got a good mark in maths. This is nonsense, of course,  but he was obviously preparing us a poor result. Budding psychologist I think. Got his report today. An A in maths.

On a more serious note on Monday I had a fund-raising tea party in order to raise money for Marie Curie. Cancer has touched many members of my family and some of my friends over the last few years and more recently over the last few months. We all hope we won’t need the services of Marie Curie but if we do they are there to offer support both to the patient and the family. So if you have an odd pound you can donate it to my Just Giving page at:

http://click.contact.justgiving.com/?qs=1613965a561de2b5fa3acf0b04a5265d5780a552fff89b5d291314ad4dfc03ccc8e54a796d845f2d

I would like to thank Eamonn Holmes for sending a lovely message wishing the tea party a success. Nice to see he hasn’t forgotten where he came from unlike other so-called personalities

What will the next six months bring.? Well we can be sure of Halloween and Christmas. Both come round so quickly I’m considering leaving the decorations up.  Maybe Paul Girvan will win NI’s Personality of the Year. Gerry Adams will remember he was in the IRA  ( allegedly ) and Pastor McConnell will become a Muslim and follow sha..sharar…sharira  .. law! And maybe Sinn Fein will accept the Fantasy budget. Oh wait? They just have!

Today I got my new car. I had a 4-year-old Citröen that was due its MOT so I took it in to be serviced.  I crossed the road to the Toyota showroom and I fell in love. It was there waiting for me, a little Aygo excite and it certainly excited me. Top of the range, automatic, reversing sensors, keyless. It was love at first sight. It’s bright orange with a black roof and will get a second look, not just for the car itself but for the white-haired old granny with the large sunglasses behind the wheel trying and hopefully recapturing her youth. Ah well, you only live once. I won’t be taking any ‘contentious ‘ routes!

Just added the photos below cause I like them.

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